The Healing Power of Forgiveness
- Jo Moore
- Oct 8
- 8 min read
Forgiveness is one of those ideas that sounds simple in theory and fiendishly difficult in practice. We all know the relief that follows saying “I’m sorry” or “I forgive you,” yet we also know how easy it is to hold on to a grudge — to replay a hurt, tighten around it like a pearl inside an oyster, and let it shape our reactions, mood, and even our health. The good news is that modern science and decades of clinical work show forgiveness isn’t just a moral nicety or a religious ideal: it’s a concrete skill with measurable benefits for the mind, body, and relationships. This post explains what forgiveness is (and isn’t), summarizes the strongest scientific evidence for its healing effects, shows how forgiveness works in the body and brain, and gives practical, evidence-based steps to cultivate forgiveness in your life.
What forgiveness actually means
Before we talk about benefits, it helps to be clear about what forgiveness is — and what it isn’t. Clinical researchers typically separate forgiveness (an internal psychological process) from reconciliation (restoring a trusting relationship) and from condoning an offense. As psychologist Everett L. Worthington puts it,
“Forgiveness is something that happens inside my skin. Justice and talking about forgiveness happens outside my skin.”
Forgiveness can therefore coexist with holding someone accountable or seeking justice; it’s primarily a change in the victim’s internal motivations and emotions, often involving letting go of revenge and reducing resentment. (nadadventist.org)
Robert Enright, a pioneer in forgiveness research and therapy, emphasizes that forgiveness is not excusing a wrong:
“The forgiveness process, properly understood and used, can free those bound by anger and resentment. It does not require accepting injustice or remaining in an abusive situation.” (Goodreads)
Fred Luskin, who directs Stanford’s Forgiveness Projects, defines forgiveness in practical terms: it’s
“the peace and understanding that comes from lessening the blame of that which has hurt you,”
and the goal is to feel better in the present. (Stanford Medicine)
Strong evidence: forgiveness affects mental and physical health
Over the last two decades, empirical research has moved forgiveness from a hopeful idea to a measurable intervention with reproducible benefits. Here are some of the clearest findings:
Forgiveness predicts longevity and health outcomes. A nationally representative analysis of older U.S. adults found that certain types of forgiveness (including feeling forgiven by God and forgiving others under specific conditions) were statistically associated with mortality risk — suggesting that forgiveness may play a role in long-term health and longevity. While observational, this study points to a potentially powerful link between psychosocial processes and physical survival. (PubMed)
Forgiveness reduces stress and downstream mental-health problems. Longitudinal research has shown that higher levels of forgiveness predict lower levels of stress over time, and that reduced stress mediates better mental-health trajectories (less anxiety and depression). In other words, forgiveness appears to act on stress — a major pathway linking emotion to disease. (PubMed)
Forgiveness interventions lower depression and anxiety. Randomized clinical trials comparing forgiveness-focused therapies with other treatments or waitlist controls have found meaningful reductions in depressive and anxious symptoms after forgiveness therapy, particularly for people hurt by interpersonal abuse or chronic grievance. These trials support the use of forgiveness as a therapeutic target, not merely a philosophical ideal. (PubMed)
Forgiveness skills can be taught at scale, with measurable benefits. Recent multisite randomized trials and meta-analyses show that structured forgiveness programs — from therapist-led protocols to self-directed workbooks and brief educational interventions — produce reliable improvements in forgiveness, reductions in anger, and modest reductions in depression and anxiety across diverse samples. A 2022 meta-analysis of forgiveness education interventions found a moderate positive effect on forgiveness and reduced anger; a large multisite trial (the International REACH intervention) also tested a self-directed forgiveness workbook in thousands of participants and reported measurable effects on mental-health outcomes. These findings show forgiveness is teachable and scalable. (PMC)
How forgiveness heals: the biological and psychological mechanisms
Why does forgiveness improve health? The short answer: by interrupting chronic stress and its physical consequences.
Forgiveness lowers physiological stress reactivity. Studies measuring heart rate, blood pressure, cortisol (the stress hormone), and even facial muscle tension have found that people who experience forgiveness — either by forgiving or receiving a sincere apology — show reduced physiological arousal to anger-provoking memories or interactions. Less sympathetic activation (the “fight-or-flight” response) translates into less wear-and-tear on the cardiovascular system. (Greater Good)
Forgiveness reduces rumination and anger. Rumination (repetitive negative thinking) keeps stress circuits active. Forgiveness interventions tend to reduce rumination and chronic anger, which in turn lowers the risk of depression, anxiety, and stress-related physical problems. (PMC)
Improved social relationships and coping resources. Forgiveness can restore relational harmony where reconciliation is possible, or at least reduce interpersonal tension. Better social support and less interpersonal conflict are robust predictors of better mental and physical health.
Neural changes. Neuroimaging work suggests that emotional centers (limbic regions) involved in threat and pain are engaged when people contemplate offenses, and that cognitive and empathic processes involved in forgiveness modulate those circuits. While brain research is still evolving, it supports the idea that forgiveness shifts emotional processing in measurable ways. (Greater Good)
Because chronic stress drives inflammation, suppresses some immune functions, and increases cardiovascular risk, lowering stress through forgiveness produces a plausible biological cascade toward better health — and this is exactly what the longitudinal and interventional studies document. (PubMed)
Does therapy and training in forgiveness work?
Yes — with caveats. Evidence from randomized controlled trials and meta-analyses shows that forgiveness interventions (both therapist-led and self-directed) tend to:
Increase measures of forgiveness (effect sizes generally in the small-to-moderate range).
Reduce anger and hostility.
Reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety in many populations (especially people dealing with relationship-related hurts and abuse).
A number of different clinical programs are evidence-based: Enright’s process-based forgiveness therapy, Worthington’s REACH model (a structured, six-step approach), Luskin’s forgiveness training, and workbook/self-help formats that teach the same psychological skills. Meta-analyses and systematic reviews support meaningful benefits on mental-health outcomes, though the strength of effects can vary by the nature of the offense, the sample, and whether the intervention focuses on self-forgiveness vs. forgiving others. (ResearchGate)
A very large multisite randomized trial recently tested a brief, self-directed REACH-style workbook and found it feasible at scale with measurable improvements in forgiveness and reductions in depression and anxiety, suggesting that low-cost, self-help formats can be effective public-health tools when carefully designed. (PubMed)
Voices from the field — experts on forgiveness
Robert D. Enright: “The forgiveness process, properly understood and used, can free those bound by anger and resentment. It does not require accepting injustice or remaining in an abusive situation.” (Goodreads)
Frederic Luskin (Stanford): “Forgiveness can be defined as the ‘peace and understanding that comes from lessening the blame of that which has hurt you… Your forgiveness goal is to find peace in your life now.’” (Stanford Medicine)
Everett Worthington: “Forgiveness is something that happens inside my skin. Justice and talking about forgiveness happens outside my skin.” Worthington’s work—especially the REACH model—breaks forgiveness into actionable steps that clinicians and everyday people can apply. (nadadventist.org)
These experts emphasize that forgiveness is a personal, pragmatic process aimed at wellbeing, not a moral mandate to reconcile or excuse harm.
When forgiveness may not be the right first step
Important caveat: forgiveness is not always helpful or appropriate as an immediate requirement, especially for survivors of severe trauma or when safety is at stake. Some recent critiques from clinicians and survivors warn against pressuring people to forgive before they’re ready — doing so can retraumatize victims or short-circuit necessary protective actions. Good therapeutic practice treats forgiveness as one option among many and puts safety, autonomy, and trauma-informed care first. If there is ongoing abuse, prioritize safety, boundaries, and justice; forgiveness can be considered later if and when it helps the survivor’s wellbeing. (The Guardian)
Practical, evidence-based steps to cultivate forgiveness
If you’re curious about trying forgiveness as a healing tool, here are empirically supported steps drawn from established programs (Enright, Worthington’s REACH, Luskin) and clinical trials:
Clarify your goal. Decide whether your aim is reconciliation or inner peace. Many forgiveness protocols begin by asking: “What do I want out of this?” If you want peace, forgiveness practices focus on internal change rather than re-establishing trust.
Tell the story and name your feelings. Write down what happened and how you feel about it. Research shows that structured writing about an offense (expressive writing with a forgiveness focus) can reduce rumination and distress. (PubMed)
Practice perspective-taking and empathy (when safe). This doesn’t excuse the offense; it’s about seeing the human complexity of the offender. Studies suggest that replacing revenge-focused emotion with compassionate or neutral emotions (emotional forgiveness) produces the most health benefits. (Everett Worthington)
Make a concrete decision to forgive. In REACH and other protocols, a deliberate choice (decisional forgiveness) is often the first operational step — a commitment to act without revenge.
Cultivate self-forgiveness if relevant. Self-forgiveness interventions (workbooks and structured therapy) have been shown to reduce self-condemnation and improve wellbeing. Many people find self-forgiveness especially liberating. (PubMed)
Use behavioral anchors to sustain forgiveness. Simple acts — writing a forgiveness note to yourself, revisiting the decision when doubts arise, or practicing compassion meditation — help keep forgiveness from sliding back into resentment.
Seek guided help when the wound is deep. Therapist-led forgiveness therapy and group interventions have stronger evidence for severe or chronic grudges; they also provide safety, structure, and accountability for processing trauma. (PubMed)
Real-world examples and outcomes
Clinically, forgiveness-based interventions have been applied across many settings: survivors of interpersonal abuse, couples therapy, rehabilitation in correctional institutions, chronic-illness coping programs, and broad, community-level educational workbooks.
Results vary by context, but common, replicable outcomes are reductions in anger and depression, improved emotional regulation, and — importantly — measurable reductions in physiological stress markers in lab settings. Large-scale trials of self-directed forgiveness workbooks show promising public-health potential because they are low-cost and accessible. (cebc4cw.org)
Final thoughts on the healing power of forgiveness: a health practice, not a moral test
Forgiveness is powerful — not because it demands that you forget or reconcile at all costs, but because it offers a way to reclaim your present from the weight of the past. The bulk of high-quality research shows forgiveness can reduce stress, depression, and anger; improve physiological stress responses; and even relate to long-term health outcomes. At the same time, forgiveness should never be coerced or used to avoid justice. The best approach is pragmatic: treat forgiveness as a skill you can learn, use therapeutic support when needed, and choose the healing power of forgiveness only when it serves your wellbeing.
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Selected references & further reading
Toussaint, L., et al., “Forgive to Live: Forgiveness, Health, and Longevity.” Journal / PubMed (2012). (PubMed)
Toussaint, L., et al., “Forgiveness, Stress, and Health: A 5-Week Dynamic Study” (2016). (PubMed)
Reed, G.L., et al., “The Effects of Forgiveness Therapy on Depression, Anxiety, and Posttraumatic Stress Symptoms” (randomized trial, 2006). (PubMed)
Rapp, H., et al., “A meta-analysis of forgiveness education interventions” (2022). (PMC)
International REACH Forgiveness Intervention — multisite randomized trial (REACH workbook, 2020–2021 recruitment; publication available). (PubMed)
Worthington, E. L. Jr., materials on REACH and forgiveness therapy. (Everett Worthington)
Enright, R. D., “The forgiveness process” and clinical materials. (Goodreads)
Luskin, F., “Forgive for Good” and Stanford Forgiveness resources. (Stanford Medicine)
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