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The disempowerment of being busy: the need to grow into your own power


stressed woman

Many of us were, and still are, brought up to be busy; to be productive. For most of us, being busy and being productive have now become subconscious actions. These are things we do in order to demonstrate that we are a ‘good person’. Such a stream of unconsciousness may well have started with comments such as, ‘life is too short to waste your time’ or, ‘you don’t succeed in life if you waste your time day-dreaming’. At work many of us have to endure long periods of multi-tasking (doing more than one thing at a time) and outperforming (being better than or beating) our colleagues which means operating in an atmosphere of separative competition rather than one of beneficial cooperation.


On one level, the notion of competition brings with it ideology of thoughts of superiority and inferiority and certainly separateness from others, making it difficult to cooperate harmoniously with others. On another level, the inference is that doing something, whatever it is, is far better than merely thinking, reflecting, imagining or day-dreaming. These latter quieter and introspective activities are generally pooh-poohed and judged as poor excuses for time-wasting or laziness. According to this train of thought, it is far better then to be an outgoing doer where you can see the tangible results of your actions. And one might well say, and why not? After all, for most of us, the schooling process largely taught us what to think rather than how to think.


And so What is the By-product of all this Busy-ness?


Most evidently, tiredness but also feelings of futility, pointlessness, exhaustion and stress. Ultimately, any or all of these mental, physical and emotional issues, if left untreated for a long period of time, can lead to significant and irreversible physical deterioration. When we are too busy, all the time, we are quite simply making ourselves sick.

We lose ourselves in endless activity, never learning how to just stop and think for ourselves. Never practising the art of imagining what we could make of ourselves. Never giving ourselves time for our dreams, hopes or beliefs. We become consumed by the thinking of the majority believing that there has to be safety in numbers, doesn’t there? The majority can’t be wrong… can they?


And so What do We Lose by Pursuing Busy-ness?


We stand to lose (or for many, never actually find) inner peace, joy, happiness, true love, contentment and laughter. All the key words that everyone uses when they are asked what they are looking for in life. We lose any hope of being other than unhappy, discontent, and disempowered to change any of it.


die spelling change

Growing into Your Own Power


Growing into your own power doesn’t require being busy and it doesn’t mean using force to get your own way – that would mean exerting control of another/others and the only thing that you can and should control is your own mind, your own way of thinking.


Growing into your own power means becoming your own person, with your own thinking so that you don’t fall into the trap of subscribing to status-quo beliefs and zombie-like un-thinkingness.


Growing into your own power means asking questions and coming up with a perspective that is yours alone because, deep inside, it resonates well and feels good. It also means spending time alone, unwired, disconnected from all that is outer... out there, not inner... not you.


Growing into your own power takes time and stillness that you cannot hope to achieve if you stay busy. Only in stillness and aloneness can you find out who you truly are because this is when you will be able to see yourself for what you are. You discover your true self only when you devote time to honestly looking at yourself, seeing what you are made of, determining your likes and dislikes and subsequently, allowing yourself to really become who you were always meant to be.


Growing into your own power means quietly reflecting to yourself, listening to bird-song, being unglued from the tv, computer or phone.

woman sitting on a rock

Growing into your own power is a knowing that being better and being right don’t really matter at all, because knowing what you know comes from within you.


Growing into your own power means re-connecting with yourself.

Re-connecting with yourself means re-discovering what makes you tick, re-discovering who you are and what you can see when you gently close your eyes, perhaps to dream.


If you are never alone, you can never truly know yourself.


If you feel the Need to Learn How, then Try a Retreat at the Razès Gîtes


The Razès in Occitanie, France has a lot that attracts people. It has no cities, no motorways and few industries, excepting agriculture. It has breath-taking beauty in its landscapes and exudes a deep sense of peace and old-worldliness, and its villages can take you back over 100 years and make you feel like the car is out of place.

It's a place where living and breathing in the natural world is still possible. It's a place which helps you to reconnect with yourself through reconnecting with nature.




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